The Oblivious Participant

Welcome to a new segment, "The Oblivious Participant". Today's inattentive, blundering assistant:

white shoes with khakis guy [hwahyt-shoos-with-kak-ees-gahy] noun

Anytime you find one of these gems outside of a bowling alley or Catholic elementary school, consider yourself lucky!

White shoes with khakis guy is generally accompanied by any combination of the following:

A) Poofy black coat

B) Any discounted NBA jersey (i.e. Shareef Abdur-Rahim Hawks, Darius Miles Cavs)

C) Delusional sense of "laid back, yet professional" appearance

D) Copious amounts of hair gel (not applicable to shaved portions of scalp)

Do NOT attempt to confront white shoes with khakis guy under any circumstances. However if you must, do not even let WSWKG think you're looking at his girlfriend, and consider yourself lucky if a cruel verbal branding of "faggot" is the only battle scar you carry during your escape.

SPEAKING OF SHOES

These photos don't exactly do justice, but Saint Mary's center Omar Samhan wears little white socks with low-top black shoes:

It took Dan and I ten seconds to find the resemblance:

Now that you're aware, go out and enjoy it in real-time. It's simply breathtaking.